Joys of Life without Alcohol

A few friends and an atmosphere of chit chat and laughter. Chilling out and letting off some steam with a glass in hand. Enjoying the company with the occasional sip. The sip that soon turns into gulps with the aid of a bottle. Day and night, the glass in hand or the bottle in sight, every drop, a drop of destruction or ‘broken dreams’. Something, a redeemed recovered alcoholic, Jean Pierre understands brutally well but can still be unimmune to. Studies have found that alcohol has more ties to negative impacts than positive ones.

Drinking is not the most celebrated or encouraged, concerning health and addiction. Reportedly, 10.8 million adults are drinking at a level likely to pose a risk to their health. It may be fashionable in the west, though for alcoholics like Jean Pierre sobriety is the greatest intoxication. “Today I find a way of living where I’m satisfied with myself. When you come back from a dark place you enjoy everything because I’ve been to some very dark, very very very dark place”, he admitted, recalling his traumatic moments.

Alcohol can be very dominating. Making one believe every happiness lies within a bottle. Seeing solution and comfort in the product instead of family and loved ones. “I drank on a daily basis, what I felt to be enough alcohol to survive. The pursuit of money, was always high on my list of priorities when drinking. I thought that, without it, happiness would be difficult to find,” says George, a member of the Alcoholic Anonymous, an international mutual aid fellowship that helps alcoholics to gain sobriety.

Before redemption, Jean Pierre felt the same. His whole life revolved around liquor, heavily blinding him to see the real joys of life and value it. “People didn’t abandon me. I pushed them away because of all my drinking. The drinking was more important than anything else”, he says. It resulted in him straining his relationship with his former girlfriend to eventually being alone and abandoned. She couldn’t tolerate the constant boozing and bear life with someone who did not know their limitations and spirals out of control. A relationship he forever lost and could not rekindle. “Every human being likes to have a companionship…their own family. You got nothing. You lose everything”, Jean Pierre openly expresses, regarding the negative effect of alcoholism on his personal relationships. According to Alcoholics Anonymous, there are alcoholics that may hide their drinking from their colleagues and their families.

“People can become physically dependent on alcohol if they drink very heavily over a long period of time”, explains Maddy Lawson, Communications Manager of Alcohol Research, an independent charity which deals with alcohol-related harm. The redeemed alkie claims his alcoholism is a phenomenon of craving, not being able to be satisfied with a limited amount or acknowledge when it is suitable to stop. “I can never quench my thirst because it makes me feel better and makes me feel good”, he admits.

He firmly believes it is an illness, an alcoholic experiencing such a state could be a sick person that needs help.  Unfortunately, society fails to understand the severity of alcoholism and how difficult it is to fight it. “Alcohol is a disease. You got it and that is a disease but people don’t see, don’t understand”, Jean Pierre says.

The office administrator drank for 30 years, from the tender age of 14 until becoming a 44-year-old man. Now, twelve years of constant sobriety and Jean Pierre could not be happier, especially when it prevents him from hitting the absolute low again. From Park Lane, living the most lavish lifestyle, having the best of everything to being excluded from society and living in a hard-cold pavement, bench and doorway. The one aspect he will never forget and most significantly does not want to relive at any cost.  “I never wanted to end up on a park bench. Alcohol cost me to live on a street. People look at me and spit on me. When I sleep in the doorway some young drunks people piss on me”, he says. "I used to wear Armani suit. I used to eat in the best restaurant, here in London, in France, in Miami, in Los Angeles.”

It was the extreme level of Alcohol consumption and not being able to have some self-control that took its toll and put Jean Pierre in a critical position. He was heavily blinded by alcohol, not knowing right from wrong, becoming wild and uncontainable. Losing almost everything worthy and significant as well as loved ones. “I have a drink and I feel good. The problem is it makes me feel good for the first, second and third drinks. Then after that, I become disgusting”, he admitted. “The landlord kicked me out because I slapped a woman on the backside. Because I start to swear.” During his unpleasant phase of endless drinking, Jean Pierre was a proud owner of a restaurant as well as a restaurant manager and a chef. He lost it all due to alcoholism. "I never wanted to lose a job. I wanted to have a job where I will receive my paycheck but not P45 before my paycheck", he says.

There have been alcoholics who have attempted a free liquor lifestyle, not giving in to temptation or at least tried to control it. “I was amazed at how difficult it was to stop completely. The longest I ever managed was three weeks without a drink”, explained Kevin, one of the members of the Alcoholic Anonymous. “The next time I tried to stop I found I couldn’t stop at all.” Some have even suffered a certain type of condition in the process. “On a few occasions when I had tried I suffered badly with DT’s. My best attempt was in December 2000. I stopped drinking early in the month and had a bad case of DT’s”, recalled George.

Charities dealing with Alcohol issues inform that having a blip can be off-putting and people should not be judgmental or dismissive of those that do have setbacks as the setback alone can make one feel bad enough. “The important thing is not to write someone off because they’ve started drinking again”, states Maddy Lawson.

For Jean Pierre, it’s the fear of not being able to stop consumption as well as the haunting memories of hitting rock bottom that has sustained him to not even have one blip. “If I had one, it is game over. An alcoholic must have a complete abstinence. If I start I never know when I’m able to finish. When I drink I lose control, I do a lot of things and blackout, I don’t remember the next day”, the recovered individual admittingly said. “So, I don’t want to go there because it’s very dark”, he continued.

Surprisingly, for someone who once sought immense comfort in liquor, the process of giving up was not too challenging either. It may have been hard but nothing tormenting. Jean Pierre genuinely believes it’s all about having a desire and wanting it to happen. “Everything in life we do need to start with a desire. There’s a lot of people who make it seem difficult for themselves. But I didn’t”, he says confidently.  I’ve got a desire, I make the decision, I put in action and now I’ve got the results.”

The experience of severe turmoil caused by excessive boozing has enabled Jean Pierre to truly be appreciative of life since being alcohol-free, having the control to do what the heart desires and not be stopped by a bottle. “A new freedom and a new happiness. That is life in sobriety”, he expresses with delight. “The bottle of broken dreams is no more broken dreams. Whatever I fancy and want to do that is the joy”. Cutting out alcohol has even given him the ability to value anything given, more than some other people will. “Live the same normal life and maybe better than some people who don’t appreciate what they got. Because today I’ve got the gratitude to enjoy. Because I didn’t have it at one stage”, he explains. “Alcohol took everything away from me.”

Jean Pierre is still vulnerable though and not completely resilient from liquor despite being sober and clean for twelve years. “I’m just recovered but I’m not bulletproof, I'm not cured. I’ve got some prayer, some meditation and reviewing my day. With that I’ve been put in a position of neutrality when it comes to alcohol”, he clarifies. It’s the regular treatment that has aided him to avoid having triggers otherwise he can easily be led astray.  “If I stop doing everything I need to do today and something happen in my life and I’m not spiritually fit than anything can be a trigger for me to have a drink”, he admits. “Even after years of not drinking, very few people would find it easy to avoid falling back into old habits or behaviours”, says Maddy Lawson.

Alcohol addiction or excessive drinking is not the ideal position to be in and life can indeed be beautiful and worthwhile without it. The satisfied recovered alcoholic Jean Pierre has found peace and comfort from feeling content and he will happily provide guidance to those who need it as he knows how devastating alcoholism can be and that an alcohol-free life is truly worth living. He believes that there is more to life than drinking liquor. It’s all about socializing, keeping busy and having something to do. “People will think there is only alcohol. There are other ways to escape or remove stress. Through socializing many things can be done. Everybody needs to find something they like to do in life”, he suggests.